Honesty is the most important ingredient in Love

Honesty is telling “the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.” Society’s definition of the truth telling is to tell the truth only if it does not make anyone uncomfortable, cause a conflict, and it makes you look good.

Dishonesty caused me to feel disconnected from others and created small walls between my partner and me. If I wanted to create true intimacy and closeness, I was going to have to let my partner see all of me. This anger, hurt, or decision was all of me. It is not all of me what he wanted and left the relationship. Then, what kind of relationship would I have if he only knew part of me?

Honesty can be tough but it is necessary if you want a close intimate relationship.


Truth is the expression of love and is therefore always the necessary healing and loving action. Many of us we taught that telling the truth is sometimes not being kind or loving. That it can separate us from what we want most, but telling the truth only separates us from our lies and our confused, limited self-images. Sure, the truth may hurt sometimes, but it never wounds the way a lie or half-truth can. If the goal is to stay within the awareness of love, the truth must be practice continuously. Our greatest fear is that the truth will be abhorrent to our lover and we will end up alone. The reality is that the longer we are together, the more we practice the truth, the more trust develops and the easier the truth becomes. When we hide nothing, we can give everything.

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